Smartphones, Tablets, and Laptops…. OH MY! Talking With Your Teen About Screen Time Before Bed
By Brie Arevalo
If Wizard of Oz’ Dorothy, lived in today’s society, her catchphrase, “Lions, Tigers, and Bears, Oh My!” may quickly be replaced with the words, “Smartphones, Tablets, and Laptops.. OH MY!”
Technological advancements have paved the way for communication, access to resources, and have enhanced learning endeavors tremendously. Teenagers are growing up in an era in which their identities and understandings of the world are tied to technology. Navigating appropriate boundaries around the use of technology is a common task many parents face today. But, with the a few reminders taken away from the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and the Cowardly Lion, we can remember to use knowledge, heart, and have courage when guiding teenagers to set healthy boundaries with technology.
THE SCARECROW: Knowledge about the Impact of Technology on Teenage Brains
Teen brains are not adult brains. Teenage brains are sensation and thrill seeking, which help to foster friendships, try out for a new sport’s team, and feel passionate about new topics. The flip side of a sensation and thrill seeking brain is the fact that teenage brains have yet to develop the skill sets to organize information, plan ahead, and control impulses in ways adults have. So how does this relate to technology and boundaries?
Teenagers do not have the insight or judgment capacities to navigate technology boundaries like adults… it is not a natural ability for teens and despite how responsible or independent they seem, they need parental guidance in this area. Yes, I said it, they need you.
While there are many aspects of technology boundaries that can be discussed, one way to help your teen set boundaries with technology is monitoring screen time before bed. Research shows that teens need between nine and eleven hours of sleep per night. Sleep helps promote mood, sustained attention, and regulate appetite. Reduced sleep related to excessive screen time is associated with increased problems with mood, physical health, psychological health, attention, and behavior.
So how does a TV or tablet impact sleep? When teens watch TV or use their phone or tablet late at night, they experience decreased quality of sleep and amount of resting time they receive while asleep. This is because at nighttime, our brains produce a natural hormone called melatonin. This hormone is released to naturally help our bodies fall asleep. However, when teens (or anyone) look at a screen right before bedtime, the light from the screen disrupts the natural release of melatonin, telling our bodies to “wake up” rather than “wind down.” This light reduces the quality of sleep by 50% and increases the amount of time it takes to fall asleep. It is recommended for teens to not be exposed to screens at least 30 minutes (preferably an hour) before bedtime.
Between homework and extracurricular activities, it is already difficult for teens to get a good night’s rest. However, in order to help your teen learn boundary setting in this area of technology use, it’s time to have a conversation about how to do that.
HAVE COURAGE, LION: Conversations with Teens
Having these conversations with your teenager may feel scary at first, but like all things, the more you practice, the easier it will get. Research indicates that simply having conversations about technology safety and health is predictive of lower hours of use! However, if parents do not set appropriate limits, the conversations do not warrant significant changes in teenage behaviors.
So how do I set clear expectations and rules about technology use within the home?
1. Figure out your parenting style and consider family culture. What do you personally believe about technology? How does it fit into your family values, culture, or rules? Ask yourself these questions to guide which rules you set within your family.
2. Set your teenager up for success! If you restrict your teenager to 2 hours of TV after school, but have the TV on in the background of your home, it may send mixed messages. Be consistent and specific about when it is appropriate to use technology (e.g., after homework is completed and for 1 hour). How parents use technology also models to your teenager how to use technology. This means that if you want your teenager to be present and engaged at the dinner table without their phone, it will be important to put your phone away as well.
3. Create a family technology plan that is open and direct. Set out clear rules and expectations so everyone is on the same page. Clear expectations, continued conversations, and negotiations about technology use can create a healthy atmosphere around this topic.
TIN MAN: Take Heart
Remember that starting a conversation is just the beginning. Just as we wouldn’t expect a child to be able to ride his bike without training wheels on the first try, it isn’t realistic to expect a teen to change a habit after one conversation. Continued conversations of values and goals are encouraged… and giving and asking for grace in the process. We all need it!
Helping your teen set healthy boundaries around technology takes all three lessons learned from the Wizard of Oz: Knowledge, Courage, and Heart.